Seeking silence as a mother

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• A bit about seeking silence when your life is full of  noise • 

I have always been a big fan of silence. The non existing sounds of lives lived around me, the monotonous noise from waves on the beach, the sounds you hear when you lay still in the grass on a warm summer day, or taking a walk on a snowy Sunday morning. Being in my zone without letting anyone disturb. After almost 7 years of motherhood you can easily forget to take notice of the silent moments, because nothing is hardly ever silent when you spend most of your time with two talkative girls and an energetic husband. There’s the constant requests for food, a toy or help to go to the toilet. An argument that has to be stopped. The loud noise from two girls playing. The many daily chores that need to be done. A little person who falls and hits her knee. A temper tantrum that started because of unknown reasons. Being a mother is a challenge bigger than any other and seeking some of that unfamiliar silence is sometimes the only thing I feel can keep me sane.

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During the last few days I have suddenly found myself in the midst of silence without even asking for it. It’s like the deep cover of snow that has fallen over the city has made everyone, including my children, a bit more calm and quiet. Should silence not turn up on its own, here are a few things I normally do when I need to create a little break of silence for myself.
Go shopping without any children. I sometimes do it after my girls have gone to bed. I listen to music, takes thing slow and enjoy the almost empty stores and the slow walk back home.
Audio books. They save me, when daily chores take up all my time. They might not be silent, but they make me feel like I’m in my own little bubble and I’m suddenly able to drown out some of the noise from the people who surround me.

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Bath time. I’m writing this in the bath room, while my youngest is soaking in a tub filled with plastic toys and foamy bubbles. Nothing gives me a better break than pouring a bath for my girls.
Asking the girls to stay in their room. This might sound tough, but it really isn’t. I have started to send the girls to their room to play instead of dragging all their toys into our living room, and even though they might get annoyed the minute I ask them, they end up having so much more fun.
Never disturb them when they are being quiet. I really want both my girls to learn to appreciate silence. That’s why I try not to disturb them when they’re being quiet by themselves. This morning my youngest was sitting on our sofa for close to half an hour, relaxing and playing with a tiny horse, and for all that time I avoided entering the room.
Seek places where they love to play. Their favorite playground, a park covered in snow, a big green lawn. Sitting at a bench in the sun watching them run around and play is the perfect kind of silence for me.

1 Comment

  1. Roberta December 2, 2016

    thank you for sharing this desire for silence. I have been thinking more of having children someday since entering my 30s. It scares me a bit to feel like i will loose who i am. it give me hope to see the way you are with your girls. i really appreciate this space you’ve created and shared with us.

    Reply

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